


Our Will, Our Choice

by Kappakay



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Fluff and Angst, M/M, Marriage Proposal
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-23
Updated: 2013-03-23
Packaged: 2017-12-06 06:30:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,548
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/732492
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kappakay/pseuds/Kappakay
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Marriage proposal one shot: Dean doesn't do long term commitments; except with the fallen angel who changed everything</p>
            </blockquote>





	Our Will, Our Choice

It had been five years. Five years since the end of the world was averted. Five years Sam and Adam have been in Hell. Five years since Dean and Cas had started dating.

It’s insane to think that Dean was set to spend his life with Lisa all those years ago. It’s what Sam wanted; it’s what common sense screamed at him to be right. But then, he was never good at listening to common sense. It had never really agreed with him, so he had thrown precaution to the wind and leapt off the proverbial cliff. After spending the year fighting for free will and choice, it was hard to follow through with Sam’s idea. It felt like it was all planned. Meeting Lisa that first time, finding her again when he was on the waiting list for Hell, finding a friggen case where she was. Everything felt planned. Like if he hadn’t gone against every rule in the book, this was the woman he was supposed to spend his normal life with. At one point, it was for him; it’s what he would have wanted; a nice stable girl, with a nice house and a nice son.

Then Cas came into his life, and everything changed.

“So what do you plan to do now?” He asked Cas, testing the waters as rain drizzled down the Impala’s windshield.

“Return to Heaven I suppose.” Cas replied, his voice as level as ever, with a hint of…something. Almost like he didn’t want to go but was resigned to anyways. “With Michael in the cage, I’m sure it’s total anarchy up there.” Silence overtook the car. Usually, this was the part where Dean would make a smart pop culture reference and Cas would do his adorable head tilt thing before vanishing. Not this time though. Strange feelings boiled inside his stomach but they weren’t completely alien. If Dean was honest with himself, he could say they’ve been there for a year, if not longer. But he never was, not ‘til now.

This was it. This was his chance, his only chance. He could let Cas go, he could let him go to Heaven and play out his role up there, and Dean could go to Lisa, like he promised. Or, he could be selfish. The thought of loosing Cas, potentially forever terrified him. He already lost Sam, the pain still fresh in his heart, and now he was going to loose his best friend. Just the idea of it made him nauseous.

“Stay.”

Just one word to start off the biggest commitment Dean had ever faced.

Looking back, Dean doesn’t regret a single moment spent with Cas. There were lots of fights, lots of threats from Cas saying he’d go back to Heaven unless Dean smartened up, and lots of threats from Dean saying he’d go on the next hunt alone and who cares if it killed him? But they always forgave each other. Of course Cas would never go back, of course Dean wouldn’t do something so reckless without his angel. And the relationship grew over time; small things uttered that meant the world to each other. I need you, I can’t do this alone, I love you. Human words that angels always heard humans say but never felt themselves. It was only after Cas fully understood the context of those words that he returned the favour in his own way. He ripped out his Grace.

The minute Dean found out what Cas was doing, paralyzing fear seized him. The memory of what Cas was like in Zachariah’s little adventure to the future played through his mind. Insecurities whispered to him saying Cas will end up like that again because of him. He’ll screw up, sending Cas over the edge and falling to the deepest pit of human seduction. Dean didn’t know the background story for what happened to future Cas, but he can bet he was the cause.

Dean had to remind himself though that last time, it wasn’t Cas’ choice. He lost his powers without any say. Now, he was doing it on his own. This was his act of free will, his choice and Dean was going to support him. 

Just seeing Cas make the biggest leap of his existence touched Dean to his core. Cas had placed so much faith in their relationship; Dean wanted to show he had just as much.

“Where are we?” Cas asks from the front seat of the Impala, confusion flickering over his face as he watches the trees fly by the Impala. Dean chuckles, trying to tame the massive tidal waves his stomach is producing. He chose a different route than the one the map suggests because he wanted to surprise Cas, so he stayed off the main road. Taking stingy back roads meant that the trip was longer, but there weren’t many signs saying how far they were from big cities.

“Well we’re not in Kansas anymore.” Cas rolls his eyes at the reference. One of the upsides to having a full blown fallen angel is now Dean could educate him in all the pop culture ways. One of which involved filling Cas’ head with different movies, including The Wizard of Oz much to Dean’s dismay.

Silence falls between the two, the only comfort being Dean’s Metallica cassette humming in the background. He has Wherever I May Roam playing to help calm him. Surely, Cas must have noticed it by now; the last time Dean listened to this song was on the anniversary of Sam’s death and the former angel knew Dean only played that song when he was feeling wound up, but Cas never commented on the music. He just laid his head back against the headrest, eyes drooping closed.

By the time Dean drove to where he wanted to, the sun was lower in the sky, not quite ready to set, but almost there. If Dean believed in perfect timing, he would be patting himself on the shoulder. Not that he cared that sunset was typically the most romantic point of any day, because he wasn’t that girly.

Reaching over, he gently, shook Cas awake, watching as black lashes fluttered open to reveal azure eyes. “Morning, sunshine. Bust out the boots we’re going for a walk.”

Cas’ brow scrunched. “Isn’t that why we have a car? To avoid such a task?”

“Ya, but where we’re going, no cars are allowed. Now come on lazy bones.” Dean’s hand clapped on Cas’ shoulder once before he opens his door and exits the Impala. The air is warm, a gentle breeze kicking up now and again to ruffle Dean’s hair but not enough to chill him to the bone. Green leaves still clung to trees as yellowed ones drifted slowly down, dancing. Everything was quiet, not another car on the dirt road, and no city for a good few miles.

The door hinge whines as Cas steps out of the car, eyes squinted in the light and mouth stretched in a yawn. Stretching like a cat, Cas observes their surroundings, trying to get his bearings before he looks at Dean, questioning what was going on. Dean just shrugs, feigning nonchalance and stuffs his hands in his pockets. Without saying anything, Dean meanders over to the trail leading into the woods, fingers fiddling with the box he had kept hidden for so long. Brow scrunched further, Cas follows Dean, taking Dean’s left hand out of his pocket and into Cas’ own.

Small speckles of light dotted the path as the two walked hand in hand. Dean rubs a calloused thumb over Cas’ newly calloused hand. Ever since Cas had fallen, he’d taken a liking to gardening. He didn’t know why, nor did Cas really fully explain why, but it brought a certain spark to his eyes. Every flower planted, every tomato grown and every speck of dirt unturned made Cas smile. Cas always liked to heal people when he was an angel, now as a human, he’s healing the Earth.

They came across a fork, and Dean’s heart leaped into his mouth, his tongue feeling insanely dry. Just a little further now. Through the trees he could see orange stripes start to appear in the sky. Faint, but ever present in the telltale signs of sunset. Cas, bless his soul, was still oblivious, and without his angel mojo, he couldn’t know what Dean was thinking. Thank God for that really. It’s a mess in Dean’s head, filled with incoherent stutterings intermixed with a lot of creative swear words that would get him smacked upside the head. Cas slowed their walk to a crawl, turning to regard Dean critically.

“Dean-“

“Just keep walking.” If they stopped now even for an instance, Dean was certain he wouldn’t go through with it. He would loose the last of his nerves and it would take him an eternity to build them up again. Cas deserved better than that. Sensing the internal struggle Dean was having, Cas squeezed his hand and returned their pace to normal. The two walked off to one side of the fork, taking a ninety-degree turn, to come to their final destination.

Nothing had changed in six years; it still looked like a massive nuke went off, trees laying down outwards from the gravesite of upended earth. The grass was longer, a tad greener but for the most part, it was unremarkably the same as it was.

The clearing wasn’t beautiful, it wasn’t postcard worthy on the outside, but it’s the story behind it that mattered. For this is where Dean was buried than resurrected. This was the end result of Cas’ endless forty-year fight, and Dean’s torture. This was the start of it all.

It had meaning to both of them, something that a random location couldn’t do no matter how ‘perfect; it was in appearance.

Cas’ eyes widened in wonder as he walked into the clearing with Dean closely behind. All kinds of emotions played across Cas’ face, little twitches giving Dean all the knowledge he needed to understand what was going on inside his head. Usually, Cas wasn’t very expressive, but Dean was good at picking up on all his little ticks. He used to think Cas was a robot, now he knew he just wasn’t looking hard enough.

Eyes alight, Cas turned towards Dean when they reached the center of the clearing where Dean used to be buried. “What is the meaning of all this?” He asks in a whisper, as if anything louder would be to dishonor this sacred place.

It’s now or never chump.

With deliberate care, Dean takes Cas’ other hand in his and gets down on one knee. Cas’ eyes nearly pop out of his head, his lips parting as he sucks in a massive breath.

“I’m not real good with words Cas, so bear with me.” Dean cleared his throat and swallowed, gaze finding and holding his partners. “Look Cas, I… I love you. More than anything, but you already know that.” He chuckles to release some of the tension, Cas smiling in his own silent laughter. “You have given up a lot for this- our- little slice of paradise. I know you have a lot of faith in us, and I want to show you that I do too. For us humans, and me especially, this is the biggest leap any couple can take short of having a threesome.” Cas rolls his eyes, but says nothing, the smile still there. It amazed Dean how human he had become in such a short time. And it amazed him how different he was then what Dean was originally shown by Zach. “This place means a lot to me. I thought I’d never want to see it again but it reminds me that no matter what comes between us, we’ll always kick it in the balls. Because together, we can take on anything: Heaven, Hell, or Lucifer himself, it doesn’t matter. We’ve ganked those sons of bitches once before, we can do it again.” Taking back one of his hands, he reaches into his pocket and pulls out the box.

“Castiel, my former assbutt of the Lord, will you marry me?”

Cas blinks, the smile on his face blowing up into a grin that rivaled the sun. “Of coarse, Dean.” Feeling dizzy from everything, Dean leaped up and caught Cas’ mouth in his own, giving Cas a chase kiss. Popping open the box, Dean removes the ring, his ring, the one his Mom used to wear, from it’s nestled chamber and slid it onto Cas’ finger. Cas raises his hand to look at it properly, the mid afternoon light bouncing rays of orange and red off the metal and onto Cas’ face. The lighting makes his face look ethereal, like the angel he once was. Dean decides the silver compliments the former angel nicely.

Dean wants to fist pump the air in victory, he wants to twirl Cas around like the cheesy Disney movies Cas loves to watch. He almost does before Cas wraps his arms around Dean’s waist, squeezing the life out of him, his strength human, but still stronger than what Dean was expecting, and he was half lifted, Cas’ stubble cheek rubbing against his. “About time” was all Cas whispered before Dean again, catching his mouth for a kiss.

“I’ve got one other thing.” Dean says around Cas’ mouth. Reaching into his back pocket, Dean pulls out a sachet of seeds. Cas plucks them from his hand, turning the pack over.

“Tree seeds?” Cas asks, looking at Dean with quiet excitement.

“I figured you’d wanna fix this place up a bit.” The clearing meant a lot to him; in a way it reflected each other, both blown apart by the others existence. That still remains true, but now, they’ve grown beyond it, nurtured it and calmed it enough to be bottled, only to be released under extreme moments of passion. It was time for the clearing to grow too.

Cas nods, following Dean’s train of thought as he looks around the field. “Part of this was my fault after all. It is only fitting that I fix it.”

“Hey man, if I hadn’t gotten my pretty ass pulled down to the Hell party, you wouldn’t have needed to.”

“Then perhaps we should fix this place together?”

Dean considers it. If he thinks about it, planting trees together would be strangely poetic. With their combined might, they destroyed a small section of forest and now, they can repair it.

Decidedly, he nods. “I don’t have your green thumb though. I’m more of a Wreck-It Ralph than a Fix-It Felix.”

Cas chuckles, pocketing the seeds to take Dean’s hand. “Well aren’t we a pair.” He remarks. Dean grins cheekily, stealing a kiss from Cas. A kiss that grows in passion, it leading into the potential for more, the want for more until Cas pulls away.

“We should come back later.” He suggests, pupils blown till there is nothing but a thin rim of blue around the black. Oranges and dark blues circle in the sky above, signaling the end of the day. “We have yet to consummate our engagement.”

“That isn’t a usual tradition Cas.” But he wants it all the same.


End file.
